


a second chance to make amends

by whichlights



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Arguing, Fix-It, Gen, OH YEAH SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SO MANY FUCKING SPOILERS FOR EP 26, Wizarding Traditions, dungeons and dragons! where death becomes obsolete, liberities taken with literally everything, no one is dead but at what cost, sad fix it?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2018-07-13
Packaged: 2019-06-09 20:58:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15276063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whichlights/pseuds/whichlights
Summary: The amulet under his shirt pulsed warmly. Caleb reached up to touch it, and looked from Beau, to Molly, to Nott, to Molly, to Keg, to Molly.“Get out.”





	a second chance to make amends

**Author's Note:**

> title from mars by sleeping at last

Lorenzo and his crew left, and Caleb could see, from his vantage point a very long way away, that Beau was kneeling next to someone on the ground. The obvious answer popped into his head-  _ someone died because of our foolhardiness _ . 

But Nott was fine, and Beau was alive and obviously shaking with tears, and Keg was-

“No,” Caleb found himself saying, walking forward. “No, no, this wasn’t supposed to happen.”

(His eyes were still open.)

Keg stayed back as the sad party that made up the Might Nein circled the body of Mollymauk Tealeaf, seemingly caught between horror and guilt. 

Caleb opened his mouth to call for Jester on instinct, and then he closed it again. 

“We can’t do anything,” Beau whispered. “We- we can’t- I- what was the last thing I said to him? I don’t remember. I didn’t think it was important.” Gods, she was crying again. “What if I said something terrible and bitchy and  _ that _ was the last thing I said to him?”

“You couldn’t have known,” Nott said, but Caleb barely heard it as he stared at the body of someone he… wasn’t sure, exactly, but someone he was pretty sure he liked, at least a bit. 

_ If I had left, they wouldn’t have done this _ , Caleb realized.  _ If I hadn’t loved them all so much, Molly would still be alive _ .

The amulet under his shirt pulsed warmly. Caleb reached up to touch it, and looked from Beau, to Molly, to Nott, to Molly, to Keg, to Molly. 

“Get out.”

Beau looked at him like he’d been the one to kill Molly, and honestly, Caleb felt he deserved it. “ _ What _ ?”

“I know a way I can fix this,” Caleb said haltingly. “But I don’t want you to be here when I do.”

Nott, always the clever one, clever girl, saw where his hand was drifting. She snatched it away, holding his hand in her’s. “You can’t be serious.”

“It’s  _ all we can do _ .”

Beau was also clever, and compassionate, and probably of all of them she was the one who was the least an asshole. She looked at him, and said, “we’re not losing anyone else.”

Caleb barked a laugh, snatching his hand back from Nott. It was still sticky with the residue of molasses from his Slow spell. They should have bolted when it failed. He should have left last night. He should have left a week ago, two weeks ago, never should have gotten attached to these people. 

“I can bargain for my own life,” Caleb said. Maybe he was just fucking tired of running. “Molly…”

“Caleb, we won’t leave you,” Nott insisted. 

“What if I make you?” Caleb snapped, and Beau and Nott scooted an inch back. “What if I said terrible things, just to force you to go?”

“You wouldn’t mean them,” Nott said. “Caleb, you’re  _ good _ .”

He gave a tired smile at that. “You really think that? What if I said you were nothing but a filthy goblin, and you’ll never be anything else?”

“Caleb!” Beau snapped. Nott looked very quiet. “Caleb, you can’t just  _ say  _ things like that.”

“Beau, what if I said you deserved it? You deserved to die instead.”

Beau looked like she’d been slapped across the face. Caleb growled at both of them. “I was  _ going to leave _ . I was going to leave, last night, when I was alone on watch. I stayed, and it killed someone.”

“How can you possibly be so insensitive as to make this your fault?” Beau yelled. “This is Lorenzo’s doing-”

“And  _ we  _ walked into a battle we had no hope of winning-” 

“Caleb, you’re my boy, you can’t do this-”

“You don’t know who I am-”

“We  _ do  _ know, asshole, and we promised to keep each other straight-”

“And we’re down to three members and a stranger in the wilderness, things  _ change _ -”

“Please don’t run-”

“Please don’t go-”

“Please stay-”

“We can’t lose anyone else-”

“Caleb-”

“Caleb-”

“Enough!” Caleb snapped, and he took off his amulet and threw it to the ground. The sound it made was less of a shatter and more like a concussive blast. “Go. Now.”

Beau and Nott looked at him, and Caleb felt his heart ache. “Please,” he whispered. “I- I want to stop wondering. I want to see what would happen. And maybe it’ll help Molly.”

Beau stood up, and grabbed Nott’s hand. Nott took it away from her, and went up to Caleb. She put a hand on his cheek and he leaned into it. “We’ll come for you.”

“If he doesn’t kill me immediately, he’ll take me to Rexxentrum,” Caleb murmured. “Now please. Go.”

“What just happened,” he heard Keg hiss as two of his best friends walked away. Beau might have responded, but he didn’t hear. 

Caleb sat by the remains of his amulet and Mollymauk Tealeaf.

\---

He waited for three days in that spot, making small fires with his magic and screaming out to any god that would listen that he’d be willing to make a deal. The only response he got was a silence, which felt like he was the punchline of some divine joke. He didn’t think it was very funny.

Caleb analyzed and reanalyzed his reasons and none of them made sense. He wanted to know what would happen, he wanted Molly back, but was he really willing to go to  _ Trent Ikithon _ for help? Apparently, because there was no way he could make it anywhere in time to hide. And he wouldn’t leave Molly’s side. 

It was dawn on the fourth day when he saw the horses approaching. This wasn’t a very traveled path, so he thought he could guess who it was. 

“ _ Trent _ !” He yelled at the top of his lungs. “ _ Over here, you bastard _ !”

The horses sped up. There were two of them, and Caleb kept his chin high.

One of them was Trent Ikithon. The other was Astrid. Looking at her was like a punch to the gut- she was so different than he remembered, because that had been almost two decades ago, but she also looked exactly like how he expected. 

“Widogast,” Trent Ikithon said as his horse sauntered up and slowed. He looked down at Caleb, who was kneeling by the corpse of his friend. “What’s this?”

“Help him,” Caleb said. “Please. I know you can. He’s done nothing wrong but show kindness to a stranger.”

Molly had always shown kindness to every stranger, giving away money with the ease of someone who knew what it was like to not have any. He was bright and shining and a  _ fucking walking rainbow _ , and a world without him felt wrong. 

Trent Ikithon looked at him impassively. “Do you even know how much trouble you’ve been? Always wondering where you went, who you’ve told-”

“I didn’t tell anyone,” Caleb insisted. “He has no idea, please. Please, I’ll do  _ anything _ .”

Astrid jumped off her horse, walking forward. “Oh, Caleb,” she hummed. “Did you love him?”

“I don’t know.”

Astrid turned to Trent Ikithon. “Master, I can cast the spell. And… I owe Caleb a life debt. Let me.”

Caleb blinked at her, and Astrid stared back at him. Caleb knew what she was talking about- they had been eight, and Caleb grabbed her arm before she fell out of a tree. She’d said she owed him her life and kissed him on the cheek. If that was what Astrid qualified as a  _ life debt _ , Caleb almost was worried to see what she’d do if someone actually saved her. 

Trent Ikithon paused, looked at Caleb on the ground, and then nodded to Astrid. “Do it quickly, then.”

“How long has he been dead?” Astrid asked as she kneeled next to Caleb, pulling a shining stone from a pocket on her long red robe. Caleb knew what it was- a transmuter’s stone.  

“This- this will be the fourth day.”

“Oh, good. That means this will work fine.” Astrid started working, chanting softly. Caleb didn’t dare to interfere or try to run or barter for leniency. He was a traitor to the Empire, he was a murderer, and he’d get what he’d get. 

It took an hour, and when it was done, Astrid’s stone disappeared in a flash of light, and Molly started to cough.

Caleb rushed forward, yelping, “ _ Molly _ ,” but someone grabbed his arms. He turned to look at Trent Ikithon. “Time to go,” he said, and Caleb didn’t fight him.

As he was taken away, he heard from behind him, “Caleb?”

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is witchlightsands, my dnd sideblog is genderfluidmollymauks and i'm... in pain tbh. come cry with me.


End file.
